“I don’t use drugs, my dreams are frightening enough.”

First off, the title of this post is a lie because let’s be honest here, I was a film major in college.  Nothing hardcore, just natural, a little doobie now and then to make me chill out and feel inspired.  Something to make me think that lighting a mechanical chicken on fire and putting it in an oven and filming it is – art.  But recently, my dreams have become quite frightening so I thought I would share.  No drugs were involved in the making of these dreams.

For the past few days, I’ve been trying to wake up early to go to the gym, but I have been failing, miserably.  The only thing I have been succeeding in is having these strange dreams during the hour I go back to sleep.  I usually don’t remember any of my dreams, but lately I’ve been remembering every part.  It’s weird and creepy and I want to share them with you.  I’m hoping one of you can interpret my dreams and tell me I will find love or become very successful, but I have a feeling these dreams are not going to swing that way,  so here they are.

Dream #1

I’m walking someplace with a tall friend who I look up to and their face is blurred.  Seems like a guy, but they could also be a tranny.  The details escape me now.  We are both wearing dark clothing.  All of a sudden if starts to rain and I open my big black umbrella with a wooden “J” handle and at the same time, this little girl appears at my side and shoots me in the arm with a staple gun.  I wake up.

Dream #2

I’m in a row boat on a lake with one of the little girls I babysit for.  She is 5 1/2 years old.  She jumps out of the boat and I jump in after her. (Let’s not even start with how awake me would never jump into a lake because fish live in there…)  All of a sudden a humongous alligator comes out of nowhere, snapping at us and trying to attack the little girl.  Somehow I grab her and swim her to the shore, which happens to be made of candy corn.  The alligator chases us and starts attacking us again, but I distract him by throwing candy corns into his mouth.  He likes this.  (Wouldn’t you?) Out of nowhere, I hear voices calling my name.  I turn and see the parents of the other little girl I babysit for and they are motioning for me to grab something.  It’s a harness, that I strap around the little girl.  They then tell me to grab on also and we fly up into the air.  As soon as I think we are saved, we suddenly drop and my stomach does the lurchy thing and then I wake up.

Thoughts?

What do these dreams mean?  How do I stop them aside from going to the gym?

I could really go for some candy corn right about now.

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